Not gunna do it: A long-winded rant

Okay, so I've resigned to the fact that I'm not going to walk this week. Or not like the big huge walks. And that crushes me. ... it really does.

I went back to RunTex b/c they called and said my shoes were in. They weren't at the store they were "supposed" to be at, but the guy who helped me before was. I told him of my ails and he seemed pretty perplexed as well. Shouldn't be that new shoes could cause shin splints, and maybe it was something else?

I told him it was new shoes, old route, familiar street surface...What's wrong with me?

I had to walk up and back in a bunch of different shoes, with inserts, without... Up and back...New shoes, no shoes, pants rolled up. (He said my left was definitely stronger, so it was odd my left was bothering me.)

So he made me return the other shoes--even though they were so cute. And the second pair was the same kind, which I already paid for and crap! I have to find that receipt. So what a mess. I hope I can get the right shoes! I'm down to like 5 weeks.

Anyway, all that to say I'm going to take it easy this weekend. And, really, it does kill me not to be able to walk. But I know in the long run, that's all for the better. I've gotten lots of emails from other walkers (yes, friends and parents have said it, too, but coming from my cohorts who Get It seems different). Really sweet, nice, supportive emails.

I figure if I can rest this week, as I have (only like 2 miles the whole week), tomorrow and maybe even Sunday, I'll be good. Or maybe a light walk Sunday. Or something.

I know it'll all be fine. Really, it will be. It's just tough. And great. And life-learning experiences.

Mom told me how proud she was of me--made me cry--and then said that if I didn't walk, that if I only made it 10 miles, that would still be okay--cried harder. Because, as someone in an email said, it would be a bit disappointing not being able to walk the whole thing. I know it's okay not to, but it would be disappointing. Mom did say, though, that if I needed to, I could be like Rosie Ruiz and get on the sag wagon up until a mile before the end.

Anyway, although slightly disappointed not to walk a bajillion miles this weekend, I am looking forward to sleeping in. No alarm. For the first time in a long time.